Members of the Body

Over the last year, several people close to me in my church have been emotionally hurt by other members. Unkindness is rampant in all churches.

Since Jesus is with us when two or more gather in his name, how can these things happen? Sin.

I understand all this well enough, but...

There is the issue of healing the relationship between the members of the body, the victim must be reconciled (forgiveness) with those that caused the hurt. Since more than a little time has passed since the events, what is useful to heal in these cases?

Going forward, when these happen again, or to new combatants, what should the response be? I have read about people meeting each other in the presence of a trusted member (pastor, lay leader), and that sounds good to me. What do you do if one of the participants refuses to meet? How are we asked to apply Grace to the situation? I sense that some of this should be experiencial, but it shouldalways start, and end, with something procedural.

All the members of a church are at a different stages in their spiritual journey. Each faith is colored differently. Each has unique gifts, personality. We are going to step on each others toes regularly. How do we reflect God's love through this process?